Sometimes I daydream that I get robbed

Sometimes I daydream that I get robbed as I’m walking home from work. Not because I want to get robbed but just because my mind wanders and I don’t exactly live in a safe place. I walked into Wachovia literally minutes after it was robbed and the next morning my manager, newborn and dog with her, was held up at gunpoint. And that’s just one day.

So I know when I walk home at night, I’m taking my chances. But I just can’t get over the fact that it’s a few blocks from my house and I’m totally paranoid about every unnecessary second of pollutants coming out of my car D:

Today I actually had money with me, usually all I carry are my keys and my $15 cell phone (it’s made of adamantium–it survived the washing machine!). On the way to work I was thinking, “man it would suck if the $25 I set aside for the Rape Crisis Center got stolen.” On the way back I was thinking, “man if someone robbed me they’d be disappointed. All I’ve got are some Tostito crumbs and empty tupperware from dinner.” I don’t even have a cookie–not that they like cookies.* Hopefully mr robber would not be disappointed enough to kill me D:

I also daydream that I get held up and then I think “Oh crap. I’m going to do something really stupid.” Then I totally freak out and rip them a new one for being jerks instead of working their butt off to earn their money like the rest of us do 😛 and then they knock me out but I wake up in a government lab to find out that everything is a lie revolving around psychic control of the internet, Mayans, and socially acceptable cannibalism and then…….. I end up with a book about Sierra ^_~

*On evening shifts, typically I go to the Visitor Center for the first two hours to bribe people into staying last minute at the B&B I work at. Typical bribes include mints, breakfast casserole, and cookies. Time is up and I start walking to the B&B–miraculously with leftover cookies. I guess leaving the VC brands me as a tourist because a guy comes up to me to bum some money. He goes on about how he’s hungry and homeless et al. Now, my friend in Oregon actually did go homeless for several months and she never begged on the street so I’m not really sympathetic to begin with. Plus I live in Savannah , I know better than to carry anything valuable.

But hey, I’ve got food and this guy is going hungry, right?

“Would you like a cookie? You can have all of them!”
“… don’t you have a dollar or something?”
“I live here; I don’t carry money. Sure you don’t want a cookie?”
He then wanders off….

D: I tried D:

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